Keira Sarmiento

A three-way friendship necklace never breaks in equal pieces. Videos online demonstrate that two of the three parts can create a heart even without one of the pieces. These videos and others with the phrase “there’s always a duo in a trio” spark online debate about whether healthy trio friendships can exist.

In almost every TikTok or Instagram reel featuring three girls on the same screen, the dreaded comment appears.

“There’s always a duo in a trio.”

Or, even worse, “Trios never work.”

Why? Perhaps two out of the three girls are a centimeter closer to each other. They may have shared a millisecond-long glance. Clearly, that’s enough to determine they share a stronger bond and are the cause of the other girl’s despair and loneliness.

Today, I speak in defense of the trios out there.

I consider myself an optimist. I like to see the good in things. However, I hate the hate on trios.

The main argument against trios is that love cannot be split equally between three people. Or that love shouldn’t be split at all. After all, romantic love can only be given to one person, so shouldn’t the title of “best friend” only go to one person?

I disagree. This statement doesn’t have to be true. Friendship isn’t something that can easily be measured. Love isn’t easy to explain. A person can appreciate different people for different qualities, so sometimes comparing the importance of different people can be like comparing apples to oranges.

In addition, if romantic love is the type of love you reserve for one person, then friendship should be the type of love that allows you to give love freely. It shouldn’t have to be restricted to one person. 

However, I forfeit! I admit, sometimes, though not always, there can be a duo in a trio. 

Hear me out.

I myself am accustomed to trios. I am one of three sisters: me, a twin sister, and a little sister.

The obvious duo here is me and my twin. I can’t argue with that. We’re the same age, go to the same school, have the same life experiences, and more. Whenever we talk about high school stuff, my little sister, who is five years younger than us, doesn’t understand.

However, sometimes the duo switches. For example, my twin is not a fan of exercising, so my default workout buddy is my little sister. 

Other times, my sisters laugh about online memes I have never heard of before. I’m on a way different side of the internet!

The fantastic thing about being in a trio is that whenever one person needs their alone time, the current “duo” can keep each other company. 

In addition, sometimes two of us will team up on the other, but being in a trio helps to keep us from overstepping boundaries. Other times, if two people are fighting, the third person can mediate the conflict.

Even the founding fathers understand! They set up three branches of government to check each other’s powers. And this trio has been around since 1788. 

As such, the saying “trios never work” is incorrect.

To be clear, I acknowledge that there are toxic friendships out there. Friends can make fun of their friends behind their backs. It’s important to leave those types of relationships. However, a toxic relationship can occur in a friend group of any number. 

Overall, trios have many benefits, and every friendship works differently for different people. 

It’s nearly impossible to correctly assess the health of a trio’s friendship through a ten-second video on TikTok. Personally, I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt.