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U.S. makes big strides in war on terrorism


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In an effort to finally eliminate terrorism once and for all, the U.S. has decided to eliminate dangerous words from the English language.

Once common words such as terrorist, bomb, kill the president, and harm, just to name a few, will no longer exist as of January 6, 2011. It is believed that if people wanting to hurt the head of the Executive Department do not have a word for what they are or what they want to do, they will not be able to cause any damage.

The U.S. has been waging a war on terrorism since 2001 and wants to end it before the terrorists strike back.

White House representative, Ralph Smith said, “This is our best decision yet. Pretty soon we will even have words such as rob, steal, and crime eliminated in order to stop all illegal activities in the country.” Though, Smith is unsure what the government will call those persons that break the law and speak the eliminated words because the word crime will have been eradicated.

Critics of this plan refer to the government as ‘Big Brother’ and say that it is unconstitutional to remove words from the English language. The U.S. only countered their arguments by saying the first amendment only covers speech that exists and that when the words are gone they will no longer be covered under the first amendment.

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The student news site of Carlmont High School in Belmont, California.
U.S. makes big strides in war on terrorism