May Lin

Women who have experienced domestic violence or sexual assault are often afraid to report it due to post-traumatic stress disorder, stigma, self-blame, and the fear of not being believed, according to Aspire Counseling.

The world loves when a woman speaks up for herself — until it makes men uncomfortable.

Women have indeed made significant progress in the past centuries fighting for themselves. We have gained the right to vote through the Women’s Suffrage Movement, won reproductive rights from Roe v. Wade, and reduced the gender pay gap by more than 20% over the past four decades, according to the Pew Research Center. 

In addition, according to the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, more women have vocalized their experiences of sexual violence in light of the #MeToo movement, with reports of sexual harassment increasing by 13% from 2017 to 2018.

Nonetheless, there is still an elephant in the room.

On the surface, it might seem like more and more women are being encouraged to speak up and stand up for themselves. What often goes unnoticed is the fact that most measures to empower women — such as #MeToo and the 2017 Women’s March — are initiated by women themselves.

Obviously, society is not made up of all women. Beyond these female-led movements, misogynistic and patriarchal undertones continue to persist throughout society. 

Society likes to put on a facade of outward sympathy for women who have been assaulted, abused, or raped by their male counterparts. Yet, when a woman’s words become too inconvenient or threaten to disrupt the status quo of the gender order, the tide turns against her.

There is no better example of this than Amber Heard. Heard and famous actor Johnny Depp were married for just a year before divorce, according to People Magazine. According to The Independent, in 2016, Heard filed for divorce and was granted a restraining order on allegations of domestic violence against Depp. 

Afterward, Depp compensated Heard with $7 million, which she donated to various charities. Many thought that this was the end of their discourse, but instead, a prolonged legal battle followed.

In 2018, Heard spoke out once again. She published an editorial in The Washington Post about her experience with sexual abuse and domestic violence as a public figure, without ever mentioning Depp’s name at all. Regardless of his innocence, Depp recognized that Heard was writing about him and retaliated by suing her for defamation.

After a long and bitter trial, a jury in Fairfax, Virginia ruled in favor of Depp, awarding him over $10 million in damages, while Heard was awarded $2 million, according to NPR.

What’s strange is that Depp asserted that Heard defamed him for the purpose of financial compensation.

Yet, according to Fox Business, before speaking out against Depp, Heard had a net worth of over $11 million, which is more than enough to provide a comfortable life for both her and her daughter.

Besides justice, women like Heard have nothing to gain from speaking out.

Considering that Depp was far more powerful and influential as an actor than Heard — with 28 million Instagram followers compared to her 5 million — Heard was disadvantaged from the start and risked tarnishing her reputation. 

The power imbalance between Depp and Heard caused a polarized perspective in the media. While Heard had some supporters, Depp’s ginormous Pirates of the Caribbean fanbase villainized her and subjected her to immense hatred and degradation online. After the case was over, Heard was forced to move to Madrid, Spain, to provide a safer life for her daughter.

Now, guess where Depp is filming his new movie ‘Day Drinker’? Madrid, Spain. What a coincidence. 

Another case that parallels Heard’s involves American actress Blake Lively. Best known for her lead role in Gossip Girl, Lively worked alongside co-star Justin Baldoni on the movie It Ends With Us, according to ABC News.

However, according to Deadline, just months after the movie’s premiere, Lively accused Baldoni of sexually harassing her and damaging her reputation. 

Ironically, It Ends With Us is about the domestic violence and emotional abuse that women suffer. Even more ironically, according to The Independent, Baldoni’s entire brand is built around being a feminist and a supporter of women. 

What I want to emphasize is that Lively has almost nothing tangible to gain from her accusations. According to The Guardian, she does not have a great reputation to start with. After what happened to Heard, she only risks tarnishing it further.  

While it’s true that Baldoni and Depp could be the innocent ones, and that we as the public will never know the full truth — who’s right or who’s wrong is not what’s important. 

The larger issue at hand is how women are silenced and suppressed when they speak out against men. Lively has faced an immense, enormous amount of hate and slander from the media in the past few months, causing her to turn off comments on various social platforms.

What’s even more alarming is that both Heard and Lively are public figures with substantial fanbases. If women in such high-profile positions are afraid to speak up, it raises the question of how everyday women will feel safe to share their stories.

What these stories tell young girls today is that they will be punished for speaking their truth. This harmful rhetoric needs to change.

When a woman speaks up, listen. In the end, it is not about who’s innocent or who’s not, who’s lying or who’s telling the truth, but rather about creating a space where women are able to speak up without fear.